


Roses are Red, Crystals are Orange...

by brudawgg



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Fluff, fluff!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-28 02:01:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17778479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brudawgg/pseuds/brudawgg
Summary: It's Valentines Day and Duck Newton's realized he finally has someone to care about for the day. Will his friends be able to help him out? God we can only hope so.





	Roses are Red, Crystals are Orange...

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pennydown](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pennydown/gifts).



> I wrote this for pennydown aka my favorite person!! please check out their stuff.

** Roses Are Red, Crystals Are Orange **

****

First and foremost, Duck Newton had never particularly cared about Valentines Day, he knew it was just a silly holiday and truth be told he never had someone to actually share the day with. The few relationships he’d been in never seemed to correlate with it so he never bothered. But for once it was nearing the fourteenth of  February and he realized, with fear filling his veins, that he _did_ have someone he cared about this time around.  
  
Which meant he had to do something, right?

Duck Newton paced his apartment, running his hands through his hair in frustration. Obviously, he had to make a card, but he didn’t want to be _obvious_. Should he make cards for everyone? Would that be less suspicious? Would that be _worse_ somehow?

After thirty minutes of Duck wandering around his apartment, he finally reached for the phone.

But who to call?

He groaned, weighing the options, before dialing Ned’s number. It wasn’t long after muttering out his fears to the other man that he began to regret his decision. He fully regretted it though when Ned laughed and barked out, “A card? What are you? _Twelve?_ ” 

Duck slammed the phone down before taking two or three calming breaths. Once he wasn’t ready to rip someone’s head clean off, he dialed the Lodge.

“Amnesty Lodge, this is Jake _Coolice_ what is _up?_ ”

Duck sighed, “Is Aubrey there, Jake? It’s Duck.” 

“Oh hey man! Two seconds, I’ll go grab her.”

For a few minutes, as Jake grabbed Aubrey, Duck contemplated hanging up and just hiding in his room until he perished. Before he could decide on that, Aubrey’s voice appeared on the other end.

“What’s up, Duck?” she chirped. She always sounded so excited.

“Well, Aubrey,” Duck chuckled, “I guess I needed your opinion on how to, ah hell, how to send go about sending a valentine?”  
  
“A valentine to _who_?”

“I’m not sure why that matters, but if you must know,” Duck groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose, “it’s Indrid, okay? Now how should I send a valentine?” 

Aubrey snorted, “Who gives a shit about valentines? Just kiss him.”

“ _Aubrey, I can’t just kiss him_.”

“Why _not?”_

“Because, Aubrey, I’m not Ryan fucking Gosling! I’m not— Jesus, I’m not _sexy_ , okay? I gotta be, I dunno, romantic! Or something.” Duck was embarrassed already at this whole ordeal.

“Okay, okay, okay!” Aubrey laughed, “So what are you asking? Want me to come over and help you make a card?”

Duck fell silent for a second.

“Oh my god, Duck, is that what you want?”

“Aubrey, I will hang up the phone.”

“No! I’ll be there as soon as possible, get all the construction paper, glitter, and glue you have!”

Before Duck could tell Aubrey that wasn’t _much_ , she had hung up. He sighed, setting the phone down, and quickly got ready to make a trip to the store.

 

* * *

 

 

When Duck returned from the store, he was met with the sight of Aubrey and, for some reason, Ned at his front door. Aubrey was banging on the door as Ned leaned against the doorframe, watching in amusement.

“Let us in, Duck! We know your secret!” Aubrey hollered as Duck silently walked up behind her.

“What the Hell are you doing?” he asked, causing Aubrey to jump in shock. Ned just laughed his booming laugh.

“Oh, I thought you had changed your mind.”

Duck rolled his eyes, “No, but you said get all the construction paper and glue I had which was, I’d like to think not surprisingly, _not a lot_.”

“Well we woulda grabbed some!”

“ _You hung up—”_ Duck held up a hand then, taking a deep breath, “Never mind. It’s not important. Let’s just get this over with.”

“Oh, don’t sound so negative.”

Duck unlocked the door, letting the two inside.

“Why exactly is Ned here?”

“I needed a ride, and why wouldn’t I bring Ned?” Aubrey made her way to the small kitchen table Duck had and slid into a chair, “It’s not like we were placing bets on your possible love life.”

“That was a lil’ too specific, Aubrey—“

“Now, friend Duck, is this because I laughed on the phone?” Ned asked, hand to his chest in shock, “I wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings!”

Duck just set the bags of supplies on the table, and Aubrey tore into them spreading everything out, eyes sparkling with excitement. Duck took a seat as well, chuckling at Aubrey as Ned slid into the third chair. Unlike the other two though he just sort of stretched out in his seat, seemingly content to just watch.

Aubrey snatched up some paper and a pencil, setting to folding the paper in half. Duck eyed her, feeling ridiculous. He didn’t even know what to do for a card and he’d been worrying about this for days. Aubrey learned about it less than an hour ago and seemed to already have a vision.

Duck was staring down at the paper in his hands for a few minutes before Aubrey glanced up. Ned watched with an eyebrow raised.

“What’s up, Duck?” Aubrey asked, propping her chin up in her hand.

“I’m not sure what to do. I’m just _thinkin’_. Is that a crime?”

Aubrey set her own card down and scooted her chair closer to Duck. “Is that the color you wanna use?” She asked, pointing at the green construction paper in Ducks hands.

“I— Well, no, not really. I just sorta grabbed it, I guess.” He set the paper back down in the pile, frowning at it. “This is ridiculous.”

Ned snorted from his seat at the table, earning at glare from Aubrey.

“No, it’s not ridiculous! Just, pick a color!”

Duck groaned but after some consideration reached for a red piece of construction paper. It went like that for awhile, Aubrey lightly guiding Duck and then resuming work on her own card when he seemed comfortable. Ned eventually began fiddling around with a piece of paper, trying to look nonchalant as he did so.

An hour or so passed of the trio working on their respective cards until Duck finally set his down, feeling more or less accomplished, but then he realized he had to actually write something and sighed, dragging his palm down his face.

“Ya alright over there, friendo?” Ned asked, peering up at Duck. Ned was practically hunched entirely over his own card, past being subtle.

“Yeah just, I don’t know what to write.”

Aubrey looked up from her card, “I got something!”  
  
“I’m all ears.”

She fanned her hands out, with a devilish grin as she announced, “ _Come Bone Me_.”

“ _Aubrey Little I swear to God,”_ Duck dropped his head in his hands as Ned lost it, slamming his hand on the table, laugh echoing throughout the apartment.

“You’re right, that’s too aggressive. _Please Come Bone Me!_ ”

Duck grabbed a marker and chucked it at Aubrey. She dodged it easily, cackling gleefully as she did so. Ned continued chuckling as he went back to scribbling god only knew what into his card.

“ _Seriously_ , Aubrey, what did _you_ write?”

Aubrey held her card up, proudly. On the front was a fairly decent drawing of Dr. Harris Bonkers with vampire fangs and wearing a magicians hat. He was holding what looked like a heart shaped box. She then opened it to reveal a message. 

_Roses are red,_

_Crystals are orange,_

_Fuck nothing rhymes with orange,_

_Happy Valentines Day!_

_Love, Aubrey_

Duck read the card, his chin in his hand, eyebrows furrowed. He looked up at Aubrey, who was grinning back at him, still a proud, triumphant look on her face.

“It’s…it’s beautiful, Aubrey.”

“Thanks, Duck! Let me at least see how your card has turned out so far!”

Duck looked again at Aubrey’s card. While it wasn’t exactly…eloquent, it was still very well made, in Ducks opinion at least. He covered his card with his arm then.

“It— It’s not done.”

“What! I let you _read mine_ , show me the card, Newton!”

Duck shook his head no, leaning so Aubrey couldn’t reach the card, “No! It’s not done!”

While Duck was distracted by Aubrey, he felt the card slip out from under his arm and his head whipped over to see Ned, holding the card in his hand. The jerk had swiped it. Ned placed a hand over his mouth, trying to hold back a laugh.

“Ned, give that back.”

Aubrey scrambled out of her chair over to Ned’s seat to snatch the card up, and fell into a fit of giggles upon seeing the front of it, her hand placed over her heart.

“Oh, Duck,” she took a breath, “you sure did your best didn’t you?”

“Well I’m not fuckin _Picasso_ okay! Sorry we can’t all be _artists_ and whip out amazing vampire bunnies and little poems!” Duck stood up, reaching across the table for the card but Aubrey pulled it out of his reach.

“No, really, the, uh. The construction heart you glued to the front? Absolutely adorable.”

Duck knew it looked like a child had made the card, he didn’t need them to tell him that. The card itself was red construction paper, folded in half (of course). On the front Duck had, in fact, glued a heart he had cut out of pink paper, and had sprinkled glitter over it. Around the heart he had written _Valentines Day_ and it was only then that he realized how ridiculous that was.

“God, just throw it out,” he grumbled, sliding back into his seat.

“What? No!” Aubrey darted back to her seat, sliding the card in front of Duck with an apologetic look on her face, “No, Duck, seriously, it’s cute! It’s very _you—“_

Duck rolled his eyes at that, earning him a soft swat from Aubrey on the arm.

“That’s supposed to be a compliment!” She hissed, “Indrid will love it!”

Ned choked then, eyebrows raised as he sputtered, “You’re making a card for _The Mothman_?”

“Thank you, Aubrey.”

Aubrey groaned in response, shooting a glare at Ned again, “Ned _not now_. Seriously, Duck! He’ll love it. The card isn’t supposed to look like Picasso did it! It’s supposed to look like you did it!”

“It looks like a five-year-old did it.”

“Stop! That!” Aubrey yelled, smacking him lightly on the arm again.

“Yes, don’t be so hard on yourself, Duck. It’s a fine card,” Ned said, doing his best to sound sincere, although that was near impossible for him it seemed.

“Tell me, Ned,” Duck said, leaning on the table, “Who exactly are you making a card for?”

Ned promptly shut his card, pulling it into his hands, eyeing the two.

“Sorry my friends, but that’s on a Need To Know basis.”

“Well maybe I _need_ to know.”

Ned narrowed his eyes and promptly folded the card up to slip into his pocket before the other two could make a move.

“That’s no fun, Ned!” Aubrey crossed her arms, pouting as Ned simply shrugged as if there was nothing he could do about it.

“Trust me, Aubrey, it’s no one you know.” Ned said, still sounding insincere, but Duck and Aubrey both dropped it.

“Write something, Duck. And you don’t have to show me! And then we gotta get you like flowers or something,” Aubrey said tapping a finger to her chin, “What flowers do moths like?”

“I thought that might come off a lil’ strong?” Duck murmured, idly picking up a marker.

“Nonsense! It’s classic valentine’s stuff. Flowers, Card, Chocolates! Or maybe just like, show up with some eggnog.”

“I’m not showing up with eggnog, Aubrey.”

Aubrey rolled her eyes, hands on her hips, “Why do I know your man better than _you_ do, Duck?”

“I’m not dignifying that with a response,” Duck sighed, resuming the work on his card, regretting this whole idea immensely.

 

* * *

  

Indrid Cold was, to say the least, surprised when this future had opened its proverbial doors to him. Duck Newton along with his friends making _valentines cards?_ He had almost dropped the carton of eggnog when he realized though that Duck wasn’t just making a card. He was making one for _him._ Upon this possibility being an option, Indrid Cold wiped the eggnog mustache off his lip, chucked the carton back in the fridge and sprinted to his sketchbook.

And then, suddenly, when it wasn’t just an _option_ but apparently what was happening— because there he was, there was Duck Newton making his way to the Winnebago door – Indrid suddenly felt severely underdressed. He flung his various clothes around ( _why, why so many tank tops?_ ) until he finally pulled out a grey cardigan. It was loose, and sort of ill-fitting, but it was better than nothing. He ran to the door then, sliding to a stop in front of it and opening it just as Duck was about to knock.

“Oh! Guess I should have expected that, huh?” Duck laughed a little, running a hand nervously through his hair, eyes glancing down at the ground.

Indrid’s plan had originally been to act, well, _cool_. He knew this was coming, and that was supposed to be an advantage. But seeing Duck in person, in what looked to be one of his best button downs, khaki pants, flowers held out sheepishly in his hands? Indrid Cold’s heart stopped, all of his predetermined remarks dying in his throat.

Duck eyed Indrid before holding the flowers out a little more. He cleared his throat, doing his best to make eye contact with Indrid as he muttered out, “Uh, flowers.”

Still unable to come up with a good reply, Indrid quietly took the flowers. He was trying to think of something to say but just couldn’t find the words. Duck was just smiling at him, looking at Indrid like he was the only thing that mattered as he handed him the card along with the flowers.

“O-oh, yes! Duck Newton, I ah, I too have a card.” Indrid carefully juggled the items and slipped the card out of his back pocket, handing it to Duck, kicking himself for how nervous he sounded. Duck blinked down at it, huffing out a small laugh. On the front was an immaculate drawing of a pine tree, covered in falling snow, and on the inside was a simple portrait of Duck.

“Jeez, Indrid, this is beautiful,” he whispered, now nervously glancing at _his_ card in Indrids hand, looking like he wanted to snatch it back.

Indrid turned his attention to the card in his hand, looking over the paper cutout heart and the glitter decorating it. He softly smiled, holding the flowers in the crook of his arm, and opened the card. 

_Be my valentine?_

_I’d be the happiest man,_

_In all of Kepler._

_Love, Duck_

_P.s. this is a haiku? was that clear? Aubrey swore it made sense._

“I- I know it ain’t _much_ ,” Duck stammered out, running his hand through his hair again. A light drizzle had begun to come down, but neither man seemed to notice. 

“No, no, Duck Newton,” Indrid whispered, doing his best to nonchalantly wipe a small tear from his eye, “it’s _perfect._ ” 

“Are you okay?” Duck took a tentative step forward, and before he could take another, Indrid lunged into the man’s arms, cards and flowers flying into the air and falling around them as they stumbled backwards and hit the ground. Duck held onto Indrid, a little winded from taking the brunt of the fall, and what little breath he did have was caught in his throat at the sight of Indrid above him and smiling. There were a few tears running down his cheeks, causing Ducks eyebrows to furrow as he reached up to swipe them away.

“A-Again, are you okay?”

“Never better, Duck Newton,” Indrid murmured before leaning closer to gently kiss Duck, smiling softly at the small hum that came from the man. “I’ve just never gotten a valentine before, I suppose I got a little overwhelmed for a second,” he whispered against his lips.

“Well now, that’s a shame,” Duck whispered back before kissing Indrid, sliding a hand onto his cheek, careful not to knock the spectacles off. “Anyone would be lucky to have you as a valentine, darlin’. Especially in that cardigan, you look awful nice.”

Indrid laughed lightly at that, shaking his head and pulling away slightly from Duck, “Don’t be too impressed, it was the only decent thing I could find.” He glanced around then, taking in the light rain and the sight of the scattered flowers, the handcrafted cards amongst them.

“Oh goodness, its raining! The flowers! _Your card!_ ” Indrid went to scramble to his feet, but Duck just held onto his waist, pulling him back down for another kiss. 

“It’s just a lil’ drizzle, ‘Drid,” Duck said in between soft kisses, his hand back to resting against Indrid’s cheek. “Besides, some water’ll do the flowers good, don’t you think?” He gave Indrid a lazy smile.

“I think you make a convincing argument, Duck Newton.”

 

* * *

 

Watching from between her fingers, perched a top a pine tree, sat Aubrey. When Indrid had lunged it had taken all of her power not to let out a significant whoop. When they kissed, she had kicked her legs in excitement, almost losing her balance. This time she was unable to hold back the very soft _whoop whoop_ she let out. But she was sure neither of the men had heard her.

She watched as they finally both scrambled to their feet, laughing about the rain as they both grabbed the others card. Indrid started collecting the flowers and Duck seemed to try to laugh it off, gently tugging on Indrid to just leave them.

Indrid just pulled Duck down for another quick kiss and resumed collecting the flowers. Aubrey had a small smile on her face as Duck draped his jacket over Indrid’s shoulders and began collecting the flowers as well. The two shared another small laugh once they had gotten everything before heading inside the Winnebago. Safe from being caught now, Aubrey began descending the pine tree with a smug smile on her face.

Ned Chicane _totally_ owed her twenty bucks.

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Valentines Day!!!


End file.
